Violent Departure

Thunder to my soul 
And lightning to my heart
Are the words of your goodbye
The tears from my eyes
Makes the rains from my sky
And floods
Washing away violently
The memories that within me
Once was
With violent winds
Cleaning away everything.

- Ruptes

The Illusion

Figure out all you know. 
Do you know much about yourself? 
Or maybe nothing at all. 
Like a white wall. 
Seems to be straight forward. 
But it takes in the light. 
Letting out a glare of it. 
What you see is not the reality. 
It is the illusion of it. 

- Ruptes

Never Felt

I’ve never feared missing something.

Or someone so much until.

I felt that I lost them.

Toast To My Mind

Toasting to the mind that I have, 
It only knows how to cause me panic,
Anxiety, and pain.
Toasting to the death you are giving me,
Not the great job you do.

Impossible To Know

There is no way that any one can know 
If I cry - is it always sadness?
Inpossible to know.
I say. I am always happy.
These tears scream JOY, even if it comes out in pain.

Today

There is - No way!
This is destined to be this way.
To look at it differently is to lose reality.
For this is what’s already here.
And thinking of what it was or could be.
Is a thought on the mind of a person with fear.
Take it for the solidness that it holds.
For your thoughts are hallow wishing to be known.
And only you will feed it your time.
Who knows them, but you.
This is what it’s supposed to be.
Deal with this first and never what you wanted it to be.
Nothing stands still and ever so slightly everything moves.

Yellow Light

The sun so bright.
Yet the darkness is so deep.
There is no shine.
Everything is a dark pit.
Drowning out all light.
Even though the sun is so bright.
A yellow dot in a dark sky.
There is really no light.
The darkness outshines the light.

Drowning

I need to know.

What it feels like?

What it is that I feel like?

What it is that you make me feel like?

What it is that the situations make me feel like?

What drowning feels like?

Wanting to scream and water fills your lungs.

Wanting to cry but the water washes the tears away.

Wanting to express something in anyway.

But the water, and the drowning only allows for panics.

It doesn’t express any other emotions.

Drowning is the equivalent of my anxiety.

For I will drown and die first before I can express where my mind and emotions are.

And you will only see my panic.

You Fool

To the me that still worries,
Die already!
There is no need for the pressure,
Or the self inflicted pain.
The only person feeling it is you –
You fool.

– Ruptes

Published at The Poetry Bar on 05/25/2020

https://lunatheblog.com/2020/05/25/you-fool/

Mourn Yourself

Cry all the rivers that flow within you.
Let it all out.
Fill the dried river with all your tears.

Everyone Thinks I am Crazy

Running across the room
for the fear of being trapped in
is very much so, the difference from when a child
for the walls are moving in quickly
even after it started slowly
the windows are closed shut
and covered in black
the doorway narrows
everything becomes more eerie
and nothing ever looks the same
the room from brightly lit
to the darkest pit you’ll ever encounter
dashing for you life
to avoid being crushed by the walls
this is daily living in my mind
for everyone thinks i am crazy
but my mind is the only one that believes me
for it lives the abuse with me

When The Music Stops

The moment when the music gets you in your feels.
Something like that air that you breath.
It becomes the existence of your being.
Blocking every receptor of pain.
Providing an uplifting feel.
A happiness that can only be felt through the song.
Something to close you out of the reality.
The pain that lurks while the music plays.
And can be felt when the music stops.